Sometimes, breaking up is the best decision in a relationship. Once you've tried to maintain the relationship, sometimes the result is not accordance with your expectation and it makes you come to a decision... Break up. Perhaps it will be very hard to tell, but still, it easier than living in a bad relationship. Well, one thing you have to understand is your partner once became part of your life. That means you can't just decide to break up without showing respect to him/her. Relationships that don't end nicely will only hurt his/her feelings further.
How to break up nicely without hurting him/her:
1. Tell him/her directly
Don't break your relationship over the phone, by texting, or worse, via your friend. Though difficult, you're the person who has made that decision, so you must have the courage to face your partner. Respect him/her and the relationship you've ever undergone with him/her.
2. Tell him/her in a private place
Obviously, break up is a sensitive topic, so you have to tell in a place where there are only two of you. It's better, if the place is comfortable for him/her, like his/her house or bedroom. It's often, after you tell your decision, he/she will react emotionally.. Of course you don't want others to see, right?
3. Don't just ignore him/her
One mistake that often happens is you just ignore him/her without saying anything and expect him/her to end the relationship first. In fact, your relationship is already hanging by a thread and sooner or later you have to say your decision. Don't be a coward!
4. Tell him/her as soon as possible AND at the right time
The sooner, the better. But you have to consider whether he/she has some works and responsibilities that can't be ignored or whether he is in a serious problem. Hang on a second until you feel that he/she is ready to listen to what you'll tell.
5. Tell him/her CLEARLY why the relationship should end
Because you're the person who want to break up, so you should have obvious reasons why the relationship should end. If he/she asks something in detail, explain! But, don't say something you're not sure.
6. Don't use harsh words
Respect him/her! Calmly tell your decision with appropriate words. Harsh words will actually hurt his/her feelings and eventually he/she will hate you, a lot.
7. Being wise to his/her reaction
Break up is an emotional moment and you can expect he/she will get angry, sad, or even crying so hard. You must stay calm, give him/her time to calm down, and then comfort him/her, but obviously you have to do it as a friend. Beware of drama, because it's often, he/she will do something to reverse your decision. Don't get trapped by drama!
At last but not least, don't promise too much like 'we can be best friends'. Being around him/her too much after the break up is like giving him/her a hope that you can be lover again. It will make you and him/her difficult to find someone new. In the end, if you have recovered from the pain, hopefully everything will be good as usual.